by Amber Lopez
Hi ladies! Hope your week is going well. Today we are going to dip our toes into a little feelings on the blog. Something that a lot of us didn't start experiencing quite as much until motherhood. Those darn hormones!! Something that has been on my mind the past few weeks as I experience life with you ladies, the topic of our burdens or baggage we have and how it relates to one another.
The military life really never crossed my mind growing up. I wasn't a part of a military family or had any direct relations to it. When it became my life, I thought okay a lot of moves and traveling. That sounds exciting and different, but honestly didn't think much else beyond that. What I did not expect from this life is that friends literally become family in an instant. Without parents or grandparents to help you when you need someone, you have to call your friends. When you are in labor with your second child and you need someone to watch your first, you call your friend, not your family because they are a plane ride away. When you need to rush your child to the ER, but your husband is deployed and your other child is sleeping, you call your friend. When you have to rush your child to a hospital in another town, you call your friend, and that friend watches your 2 kids without hesitating until you are safe and sound at home. When your sitter cancels on you last minute, you call your friend and they throw them in the double stroller for strides and call it a day. Friends are no longer just friends, they are family, and they will do anything for you.
Something I heard from a mom a couple weeks ago really stuck with me, "Well I don't want 'this' to be anyone else's burden." She was talking about a particular hardship she was going through with her son as another momma offered up some support. I am so guilty of this. "I don't want to burden you, but.." is a way we start this scenario. But the fact is, we are each other's burdens and we are so glad to be. Everyone has a 'this' (a struggle in our life), especially moms, and the best way to get through those are together. The instances I mentioned above are all stories that are true that I have witnessed through FIT4MOM here in Fayetteville. This village is something that most people never experience. Women caring for each other AND each other's kids just like their own family. Burdening someone else shouldn't be a negative connotation. By giving someone else your burden, you are allowing them to give you the grace and helping hand that they have and are ready to share. And when it comes their time, they will know they need to share their burden with someone as well.
A lot of times as women, we love to be on the giving end of that equation right? Someone is need, everyone can't wait to jump at the chance to help that person. Especially in this group, I see it so often being around you amazing ladies. Women love a job to do and to do it well. But, when it comes time for you to be the one needing something, you stop and worry about putting your troubles on someone else. This village is made up of so many women waiting to share YOUR burden, lets start letting each other carry our weight with us. Just typing this makes me feel like I have less weight to carry (whew!). Living in a town with no family can be really scary, but once you find your village you realize you do have family here. You meet with them every morning and sweat and tell them about your victories and your failures. And together you tackle those 'burdens' one middle of the night ER trip at a time.
So, I challenge us to not only carry each other burdens, but let your burdens be carried by your FIT4MOM 'family.' Trust me, your load will feel lighter and your friendships will grow. Let's stop using the word burden and start using the word opportunity, because that is what a problem is, it's a opportunity for someone else who is able to help you in any way they can.