by Amber Lopez
Happy New Year mommas! We are back on the blog for 2018! We really appreciate all of you reading (and commenting) during the fall of 2017 as we dipped our toes in this whole blogging thing. We hope to continue and grow in this area in 2018 as much as we can!
The topic all over the internet this week is New Year Resolutions. Being in the fitness industry we look forward to this time of year because we can potentially grow and help a lot of women reach their health and fitness goals that they set now. Everyone loves the idea of a fresh start and a reason to set some goals in their life. I love this as well! I think it is not only fun, but also beneficial to sit down and write out some areas for yourself and your family to improve on. It is always nice to know where you want to be and this allows for you to see it and set a plan on how to get there. I truly hope many of you are feeling excited and motivated to work towards some goals in your life. While I think goals are important, today I wanted to look a little deeper into the reason and fruition of those goals.
To start I want you to compare your life as a mom of littles to say your mom's life as a mom of littles. The biggest difference today in motherhood than say 30 years ago is the social media. The reason I bring this up is it could be the desire behind a lot of resolutions set this year for many women (or men). For example, seeing an old friend's post and thinking "wow she lost weight, well, I need to lose weight like her." Enter goal: Get skinny in 2018. Now, I think using other people as motivation is great and is something we utilize in class but, there is a line between doing something for yourself and doing something out of the shame of comparison. Here is quote I found from 2 mom bloggers on Facebook, Cat and Nat (side note, that is the link to their Facebook account. You should follow them immediately because they are hysterical and very REAL).
The reason I bring this up is not to bash social media because a lot of good comes from that. But the reason I do bring it up is because if you allow it, the comparison trap of social media can destroy you. It can cause a lot of shame and can cause a lot of guilt about who you are. We are all different and everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. So, when it comes to News Years Resolutions, I challenge you to sit down and evaluate some of your goals and dig into where they are coming from and why you want to accomplish them. The why in doing something is what really gets you to the finish line, and the why should never be because you don't feel good enough compared to XYZ. You are a mom and you are doing the hardest job there is by raising little humans. Don't set too high of expectations for that job. You know how to love your child and provide for them, it may not look the same as someone else but it doesn't mean you are failing.
So, I challenge you to sit down with a pen and write out some goals for yourself and for your family. Whether they be fitness goals, family goals, budgeting goals, or health goals, be sure to dig into the why and fruition of those goals. Where did they come from? Make sure they are goals from your desires and not someone else's. And remember when making them, to give yourself grace, especially in the area of motherhood. Think about motherhood 30 years ago and think about your goals and how they compare. I understand some things have changed and goals will be different, but take a look back at that quote. Check the amount of pressure we put on ourselves to provide the BEST of the BEST in everything. When our kids really just want us to be us because to them spending time together is the BEST.
I am so glad we have this village where we know we can come and be ourselves always. Motherhood is hard enough without the scrutiny and shame to do everything the "right" way. We are all moms here and know how hard it can be just to live everyday. Give yourself that grace and live everyday with your kids, just being you and allowing them to be them. Use this new year to set some reasonable and meaningful goals that are YOUR goals and no one else's. New year, do YOU!